


The Book

by orphan_account



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 17:00:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8761507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Takes place after A Novel Idea. Rita shares her story with Lincoln, and other stuff happens that day.





	

“It should be around here somewhere…” Famous, billionaire thrill-seeker Link Loudman whispered to himself as he traversed the humid Amazon, determined to unearth one of the lost wonders of the world. Brandishing his trusty machete, Link hacked and slashed his way through the forest’s thick foliage with ease. Money could buy him everything, but not the rush he got from plundering hidden tombs or climbing the most dangerous mountains this world had to offer.

His current mission was a daunting and difficult one; Track down the Temple of the Lost Descendants and discover the untold secrets within. After countless months of research and an anonymous tip in the mail, his search led him to a hidden village just north of Bolivia. A native pointed him towards the destination but not before giving the brave explorer a warning of impending doom. It would take more than a few tall tales of superstition to scare Link Loudman off though. Curses be damned, he welcomed the challenge! All the blood sucking leeches, venomous rattlesnakes and cloaked figures stalking our intrepid adventurer wouldn’t deter him for a second.

Cloaked figures? Oh yes, highly dangerous ones at that. Link was no fool however; he knew in his gut from the minute he set foot in South America that he was not alone. Had he been bugged? Was this all an elaborate set up? He wasn’t sure how but that was far from important right now. The rugged Link stopped dead in his tracks and wiped the sweat from his brow, alerting his pesky followers that he was well aware of their presence. He knew they knew and they knew he knew that they knew. Link Loudman tightened the grip on his blade. He wasn’t trapped in the jungle with the enemy; the enemy was trapped in the jungle with him!

* * *

“Whoooa,” Lincoln Loud folded his hands in, closing the book shut. He pulled his head up and with mouth agape, turned his gaze to his mother.

“Well don’t leave me hanging, what do you think?” Mrs. Loud sat patiently at her desk, legs crossed as she twirled a pencil between her fingers, eagerly awaiting her son’s response. After the events at work the other day she was suddenly struck by inspiration that rekindled her love for writing. It was found in the form of her one and only boy, Lincoln. He may have destroyed the cherished novel she spent the last 7 years of her life slowly working on but that didn’t bother this mother of 11 much. Besides, the tales he told and escapades he explained that fateful day gave her an idea for something much more enthralling. It would put her old story to shame one thousand times over. “I call it ‘Link Loudman and the Twisted Temple’s Eulogy,’ title still pending!”

“What do I think?” The boy broke his silence as he returned the WIP to his mother. He cracked a grin that slowly turned into a full blown, toothy smile. His eyes sparked with admiration and the blank expression he had transformed into one of pure elation. “I THINK IT WAS INCREDIBLE! It had to have been one of the best stories I’ve ever read! Link Loudman is such a cool character. He’s fearless, strong and has an upstanding sense of morals! He’s like something out of a comic book yet still grounded in reality. I had no idea you were such a talented writer mom.”

“Oh you flatter me Lincoln,” Mrs. Loud giggled, waving her hand in dismissal. The woman blushed profusely. It was nice to be complimented for something other than her cooking for once. “I had a feeling you’d like it since I wrote it with you in mind! But how do I know you’re not just saying all that because I’m your mother?”

Lincoln Loud slammed his hands down on the desk.

“No way, I’m serious mom! This is the real deal! A true epic in the making! How come you never pursued a career in writing? You’ve clearly got a knack for it.”

Mrs. Loud let out a hefty sigh of exasperation and regret. In retrospect, Lincoln felt like it might not have been such a good idea to pry into his mother’s past.

“Well I was going to way back in college,” The blonde woman stood up and turned off the desk lamp. Lincoln stared into his mother’s eyes. They seemed a bit sad and empty as she lost herself in thought for a moment. “But then I met your father. We fell in love, got married and then Lori came along. Then Leni. And Luna. And, well you know the rest. I knew writing wasn’t going to pay the bills so I fell back on my second option. Dentistry!”

“Oh,” Lincoln mumbled under his breath. He felt guilty hearing his mother’s story about her crashing dreams. Perhaps if he and his sisters weren’t around she could have had a rich and fulfilling life. Perhaps she could have been more than that lady with the dozen kids. “Sorry about that.”

Mrs. Loud responded instantly.

“Lincoln Loud don’t you dare apologize for anything!” The matriarch of the Loud house got down on one knee, grabbed her crestfallen son by the chin and directed his vision to hers. “You and your sisters have nothing to feel bad for. I don’t want you to think for a second that I regret having any of you! You kids are the best things to ever happen to me since I met your father and I wouldn’t trade any of that for the world.”

The caring woman reassured her son by pulling him in tightly and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. Lincoln warmly smiled. He wrapped his arms around his mother and hugged back, pleased to know that his existence wasn’t a burden to her.

“Thanks mom.”

“No, thank you Lincoln! It’s all because of you that I was able to REALLY get back in to writing after all these years. I can feel the juices flowing in my brain. Oh goodness, do you think I can actually get this one published?”

“Think so? I know so!” The boy exclaimed, leaping ecstatically into the air.

“Ooooh how exciting! Let’s not jump to conclusions though. I got to actually finish the darn thing first!”

The mother and son left the master bedroom with a slightly strengthened relationship. Rita was feeling wonderful about herself and had a relatively new lease on life. For the first time in years she exuded actual confidence and determination.

Lincoln was proud to see his mother so content and overjoyed. She sacrificed and did so much for the family every single day. If anyone deserved to be happy it was her.

“Hey mom, do you think I can read the next section of the story when you’re finished with it? I’m really excited to see more and I can even give constructive criticism!”

“Sure thing honey. You can be mommy’s little editor!” She spoke in a sickly sweet tone as she patted her child on the head. “For now though how about helping me cook dinner? I think we’ll have tacos tonight! Doesn’t that sound fun?”

 

. . .

 

“And then our boss came running into the office shouting, “No Jonathan I said more Toner! TONER!” He wasn’t fired but needless to say the printer was beyond repair!”

“That’s a wonderful story dear.” Mrs. Loud feigned interest in another one of her husband’s tales from the workplace as she took a sip from her drink. A round of lukewarm laughs could be heard around the table.

“That’s a pretty funny story pops,” Luan genuinely giggled. “Sounds like Jonathan got himself stuck in a real JAM!”

“Sweetie, you know how I feel about jokes at the table.” The head of the household reprimanded the jokester, waggling his stern finger at her.

“Whoops. Sorry.”

“That’s alright Luan; it was a hilarious one so I’ll let it slide this time! Whew, what a great week this has been! Has everyone else been doing well lately?”

The older siblings responded with a series of “mehs” and “ehhs” as they continued to eat their food in silence. They were all so eager to leave the boring prison that was the dinner table and resume their respective hobbies.

“Anyone have any fun stories to share?" Papa Loud continued to make small talk. He was always interested in hearing how things were going for his family. "How about you Luna? No? Lori? Lynn? Anyone? Well alright then! MMMMMM THIS FOOD IS DELICIOUS! How do you do it dear? What’s your secret?”

Rita held a taco mere inches from her face but didn’t bite into it. She sat there for a good 10 seconds, lost in thought. It took a series of finger snaps right in her ear to bring the woman back down to Earth.

“Yoo-hoo, Mooom. Is anyone home?” Lynn playfully asked her bewildered mother.

“Huh? What was that?” The startled lady looked around the table in confusion. All eyes were on her now, their judging gaze piercing holes through her body. “Oh how embarrassing. My mind was in the gutter and my head was in the clouds!”

“Is everything alright dear?” Mr. Loud questioned his spouse, eager to know what had her so occupied. “Did you have a rough day at work?”

“Oh no it wasn’t anything,” Rita reassured her wondering family. “I was just deep in thought brainstorming ideas for my story and got a teensy bit distracted.”

“Brainstorming?" Her husband rubbed his chin with intrigue. "Are you getting back into the writing game again? That’s wonderful dear! Don’t be a brainy baron, share those juicy thoughts with us!”

Stifled groans and exasperated sighs could be heard all over the room. Rita’s face lit up brighter than their second youngest child. She was absolutely thrilled to hear her husband take an interest in what she was doing. It gave the woman a sense of validation which was always a pleasant gift.

“Well I’d be more than happy to share what I’ve got with you,” the giddy gal wiped her smiling face with a napkin as she prepared to speak. “What I have so far is just a little something Lincoln inspired me to write. It happened just the other day when I took him to work with me on Take Your Daughter To Work Day. It’s about a tough, daring adventurer who—”

“HOLD THAT THOUGHT SWEETIE I CAN’T BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT,” Mr. Loud’s sudden outburst nearly scared Rita out of her socks. It certainly managed to zap some life into the lifeless dinner table. “Guess what girls? There was a computer error at work last week that was only just discovered today!”

“So?” Lori curtly responded, rolling her eyes in neutrality. She didn’t understand why something so mundane was cause for announcement.

“Soooo…” Papa Loud continued. “It really fumbled the scheduling around at the office. Everything was moved a week back. Do you know what this means?”

The elder sisters exchanged confused looks as they scratched their heads. This shocking revelation he prattled on about had all of them stumped.

“No?” Leni spoke with trepidation. She was more lost than usual.

“It means that Take Your Daughter To Work Day wasn’t last week, it’s this week!”

The room was filled with audible gasps of shock at the bombshell that was just dropped. It was a reaction like something out of a daytime drama. This wasn’t the return of a long lost twin brother or a scorn lover taking revenge, it was something much greater!

“Are you serious dad?” Luna spoke as she pulled herself up in disbelief and slammed her fists on the table. Her sudden movements knocked her drink over in the process. What her father had just announced really began to sink in. “Does this mean we get an encore presentation?”

“It sure does!” The Loud monarch stood up, proudly placing his hands on his hips. With a warm and delighted smile on his face, he delivered the confirmation in a booming voice. “This Saturday, Take Your Daughter To Work Day is back in action!”

A plethora of screams and applauses echoed throughout the house. The remaining girls at the grown up table hopped out of their chairs and waved their arms around in excitement. The joy the sisters received from their father’s proclamation was like nothing this house had ever seen before. Two whole Take Your Daughter To Work Days in one year? It was like a dream come true.

The usual kiddie table ruckus from the next room over screeched to a halt. Six curious heads peaked around the doorway to investigate the disturbance. The dining room was never this busy and loud before.

“Did my ears deceive me?" Lisa chimed in, adjusting her spectacles. "Do the rumors being passed around this house hold any credibility?”

“Is it true dad? Is it true is it true is it true!?” Lana and Lola shouted as they jumped about in unison, waiting for the answer they were hoping to hear.

“You better believe it girls!” The father enthusiastically informed his little ones, hyping up the entire house. He didn’t want to leave anyone out of the merriment. “I hope you’re all ready for round 2!”

The younger siblings, sans Lincoln, dashed into the dining room without a moment’s notice. They screamed in joy at the top of their little lungs, running around the table celebrating the second coming of their favorite lesser holiday. Luna carried Lynn on her back, marching around the house in triumph. Lori tossed Lily into the air repeatedly. Even the youngest and oldest siblings couldn’t contain their delight. The twins latched on to their papa’s legs, a nonstop series of THANK YOUs flowed out of their mouths. Even Lucy cracked a smile as she clasped her hands together. Sometimes the world wasn’t such a cruel and dark place. Times like this made existing worth it.

“I knew you girls would enjoy the news!" Papa Loud said with delight as he surveyed the room, acknowledging the overwhelming gaiety of his girls. It put him in a fantastic mood. "You know all this commotion has really put me in the mood for some ice cream! WHO ELSE WANTS SOME?” The incessant shrieking produced by the ecstatic horde of females was only amplified by their dad's tasty offer. Their combined high pitched squealing was almost enough to shatter the windows. “Everyone hop in the van, we’re going to Ren and Larry’s 41 Flavors! That means you too Lincoln!”

The boy in the orange polo stuck his head back into the dining room at the mere mention of his name and smiled radiantly. He didn’t need to be told twice. The big news didn’t exactly excite him like it did his sisters but he wasn’t one to turn down free ice cream.

The crowd of Louds stampeded out the front door, arguing over different flavors of ice cream along the way. They pumped their fists into the air, chanting DAD over and over again as they poured into Vanzilla. The sound of a dozen cheering kids echoed into the night as the car pulled out, drove down the street and disappeared around the corner.

The abandoned house grew deafeningly silent. The lights were on but the life was gone. Still sitting at the table was a single soul who remained quiet throughout the whole ordeal. Rita Loud took one last sip of her drink and glanced around the room. Empty chairs and half-full plates were the only signs that anyone was ever present. The lonesome woman let out a despondent sigh and stood up.

“Well I guess dinner is done for the night. YOU’RE WELCOME!”

Rita gathered up all the unfinished dishes and carried them to the sink. Normally this was a chore for the kids but they clearly weren’t up for the task tonight for obvious reasons. The aggravated housewife grabbed a sponge and got to work. At least it was nice to have some quiet around the house for once. She was emotionally and physically drained, more so than usual. Who knew being a mother of eleven would take such a toll?

As she scrubbed dish after dish, Rita soon lost herself in the monotony of the tedious task. Wiping grime led her to reflect on events prior. Why was she so perturbed and upset she wondered. Was it the ice cream? No, it was never about the ice cream. Ice cream had done nothing wrong. It was something else. Her eyes narrowed slightly when she found the answer she was searching for. It was when she was about to share her story at the table that things got muddy. Her grip tightened on the dish she held. Nothing noteworthy or spectacular ever really happened in her daily life so when something finally did, it was her chance to impress. She was so eager and excited to have something going on for once. Then that whole business about Take Your Daughter To Work Day reared its ugly head and everything snowballed from there. It was a tad demoralizing to be dropped like that. It was pure dejection. It hurt just a bit. Rita began scrubbing harder and harder.

This was just one of many events over the past few weeks that piled up and weighed the woman down. Work had been especially grueling as of late. So many cavities and root canals, so little time. It seemed none of her children were all that interested in chatting or hanging out with ol’ mom anymore either, but why? How come they always flocked to daddy for fun and thrills? She was still hip and with it, right? None of that compared to what was eating away at the middle aged woman most of all though.

Rita thought the moodswings and hot flashes were just random occurrences until she missed her monthly visitor. A trip to the gynecologist’s office a while back confirmed her fearful suspicions. It was the onset stages of menopause. Every woman would eventually face it in their life; Rita just wasn’t expecting it to happen so soon. The news hit her like a speeding semi transporting a ton of bricks. This Loud’s best years were now behind her. She didn’t dare mention it to her husband though. What would he think if he found out the lovely lady he fell in love with all those years ago gone? Their relationship wasn’t so superficial and she knew he wouldn’t fall out of love like that but the thought still worried her a bit. 

Every word she spoke to Lincoln earlier was 100% true. She had no regrets about having so many kids, she loved each and everyone one of them with all her heart. Still though, sometimes she wondered what if? She didn’t want to admit it but it couldn’t be ignored much longer. Rita Loud was getting older, that was a fact. She was falling into a rut and wasn’t sure if she could climb her way out. Is this what they called a midlife crisis? The mere thought further upset the woman. She felt tired. She felt irritated. She felt unappreciated.

CRACK.

“Oh shoot!” Rita hadn’t realized just how hard she was scrubbing that plate. The porcelain dish shattered with such ease that it startled the woman half to death. She sighed once again, disappointed that her emotions got the better of her. ‘To hell with this’ she thought out loud as she threw the broken shards into the trash. She needed a break. She needed a hot, relaxing bath. Most importantly, she needed to write.

 

. . .

 

“DAAAAAAD!” Lola cried out, her blood curdling shriek echoed in everyone’s ears. “Lana won’t stop licking my ice cream, tell her to back off!”

“Stop crying Lola I only licked it ONCE,” Lana stuck out her tongue, further enraging her twin sister. “I said I just wanted a quick taste!”

“Alright girls settle down,” Mr. Loud pulled into the driveway and parked Vanzilla. “It’s getting late so everyone exit the van and quietly—”

“Last one in the house has to change Lily’s diaper!” Lynn shouted as she hopped out of the open van window and rolled onto the pavement. Not a single drip of ice cream spilled during her acrobatic maneuver.

“No way I’m getting stuck on diaper patrol,” Lori exited the vehicle and ferociously dashed after Lynn. The rest of her stampeding siblings were right on her tail, equally determined not to be the final one to enter the house. “You can all LITERALLY eat my dust!”

Papa Loud sighed but followed up with a hearty chuckle. Oh to be careless and young again!

Mrs. Loud exited the bathroom, having just emerged from her much needed, highly relaxing bubble bath. A thick cloud of steam followed the woman down the hall, dispersing as she turned right at the intersection. Donned in a fuzzy, pink bathrobe and matching pair of flip-flops, Rita displayed a calm, gentle smile. That hot, soothing soak was just what she needed to ease her troubled mind and put some pep in her engine. She wrapped a towel around her still dripping hair as she descended the stairwell. As she reached the bottom set of stairs, Lynn burst through the front door like a rocket. The middle aged woman placed a hand on her chest, taken aback by the startling entrance. She could swear she felt her heart stop beating for a few seconds. She took a deep breath and regained her composure. That tranquil peace she had just experienced was heaven but all good things had to come to an end.

“Yes, I win again!” Lynn stood up and raised her arm in victory as she mimicked the cheers of a rowdy audience. “You guys better step up your game, at least make creaming you all a challenge! Oh hey mom, what’s up?”

“Well then did you all have a good time?” Rita inquired with just a tiny sliver of curtness as sister after sister poured into the house.

“We sure did,” Luna answered as she enthusiastically licked her delicious scoop of ice scream. “Who would have guessed that today was Free Ice Cream Day? Oh sweet Rocky Road, won’t you set me free!”

“Oh well isn’t that wonderful,” Rita muttered with a hint of sarcasm. She was trying her best not too come off as too sarcastic, especially in front of her kids. She was still their mother, not a neglectful babysitter. It had been a long night for the restless mother of 11. “I wish I could have been there.”

“Don’t feel too bad mom,” Lincoln interjected as he approached his mother, lapping up a vanilla cone of his own. He stuck his hand out and handed her a small blue cup with a pink spoon and a single scoop in it. “We got you a little something too. It’s Red Velvet Cake, your favorite!”

“Oh why thank you sweetie,” Rita lit up and gladly accepted the delicious delicacy. Her salty temper melting into pure sweatiness much like the ice cream in her cup. She didn’t mind too much. “I guess a little ice cream never hurt!”

“By the way,” Lincoln added as he dipped back in to his cone for more. “Have you gotten any more writing done? I’m really excited to read more.”

“I know you are you eager beaver,” Mrs. Loud ate a scoop of ice cream with her tiny spoon, savoring the sweet flavor as it danced upon her taste buds. “I’ve made some more progress but it’s not ready yet. I’ll try to have something for you to read by tomorrow. That okay with you?”

“No problem mom,” Lincoln gave the woman a thumbs-up and a smile that showed off those big buck teeth of his. “Take your time!”

“Are you like, writing something mom?” Leni curiously inquired as she often does, trying to lick the reduced fat Rainbow Sherbet from off her own nose. “That’s so cool, I wish I could do something cool and creative but all I know is sewing, baking and carpentry. I’m like, so jealous!”

“I certainly am,” Rita turned to her second eldest daughter, feeling enthusiastic that someone else was beginning to take an interest. Rita ignored the fact that she mentioned this at the table and got no response. She couldn’t stay mad at Leni. No one could. “Do you want to hear more about it this time? I’d be happy to share with you what I’m working on.”

“Sure! Just as soon as I get this ice cream off my face. Oh, why couldn’t my tongue be longer?”

The gorgeous savant wandered up the stairs with as much grace as a person attempting to lick their nose could muster. That splotch of sherbet wasn’t going down without a fight. That would probably be the last time she came downstairs for the night. She probably wouldn’t even remember her mother’s offer. Leni had a tendency to forget things at times. It wasn’t her fault. Tsk tsk. So close to reeling her in yet so far.

“Good night mom and good luck with the story!” Lincoln shouted as he bolted up the stairs alongside the rest of his sisters.

“Good night Lincoln!” Mrs. Loud returned the sentiment as she sauntered into the master bedroom. It was nice to know that there someone around the house that was so supportive of her hobby. What a swell kid.


End file.
